today marks your half birthday. you are six months old. and, time is playing tricks on me. you see, it doesn’t feel like that long ago that you were so much smaller. a newborn. all skinny legs and pampers swaddlers and downy hair and unfocused eyes. that you seems so close in time. and yet, it also feels like you have always been with us. there was life before you, but i remember it in a distant and indistinct sort of way. because, you are here now, and life is different.
you are a second child, and i so wanted to defy the stereotypes and make sure that i recorded every detail of your life in photos and words – just as i did for your sister her first year of life. but, that isn’t happening. at first, i felt terribly guilty about this. then i realized a rather obvious truth. i am a different person than i was when i had your sister. and, we are a different family. and, you are a different baby. things don’t have to be the same.
words may not track your every move on my blog, but, i promise you, your words are written on my heart.
life is busy, my little friend. our life as a family is a pulsing living loving thing that ebbs and flows. you are at its center. you – with your big, inquisitive, eyes. your sensitive stomach. your high-pitched squeal. your reluctant laugh. your plump little hands always searching. you are always searching.
at six months old, you love to be held. (you are on my lap right now, as you often are while i work). you are mommy’s baby. you nurse – all the time. and, i don’t care. i relish in your need for me. you sleep beside me in the bed. snug. warm. loved. you have dimples at your elbows and rolls on your thighs. you are quick to smile, but slow to laugh (a discerning sense of humor). you greet your daddy at the end of his day with the biggest gummy smile. you have two front teeth (on the bottom in the middle) that have bothered you for several days now. you and your sister have a lovely, loving, relationship. she loves to make you smile and laugh. she eagerly waits for you to wake up every morning and greets you with the happiest smile. she says often, “i love my baby. i am so glad that we have her.” me too.
we call you baby eliot. and elly belly. and elle.
you are treasured. you are at the core of us.
you have set in motion so much goodness. so much healing. so much love. so much happiness. thank you, baby eliot, for being.